Go through motions. Loose emotions. Our dreams, long forgotten Don’t know why we got them Party here, Party there; I lost my self in 54 th. Mind is eeire the body weary. I need you to remind me; please remind me.

“How do you know? who to kiss?who to love?how to live?”

“You just kind of learn along the way”

“what if your really bad at learning?”

“well then you turn out like you”

“fuck off!”

“maybe i would if youd stop staring in the mirror!”

Do you remember all the things we promised each other? Who knew it would be so hard to keep them. Not me, I remember a time not too long ago full discovery. waking up at dawn when every thing is still gray and blue. Stealing my parents car while they slept just to drive you back home. Or the nights we spent outside smoking on the grass, we’d wake up the next morning cold and dirty from the night before; so i started bringing blankets. Do you remember how we would stare at the trees and compare them to faces or animals. Or the first time we kissed by the elementry doors. It was raining and we didnt have any where to go so we sat there in the cold, kissing for the first time; I was so nerveous. Do you remember picaso? That was my first art show you know. I wanted to look cultured in front of you. Do you remember me on shrooms? I did alot of crying that night but I was just happy to be with you. We said we would part ways if we ever changed. Well everything has changed. So have we, this is one of the worst chapters I’ve starred in. Ive said it before and i’ll say it again, and again until it stops aplying. Hurt people; Hurt people. 

Happy new years. I wonder at what peoples resolutions will be? To stop being a cashier? or a bus driver? some times I wonder why we even bother. Why I bother. I dont know why I’m in Japan, doing god knows an awful job that doesnt make me happy. I Hate violence yet here I am haha. This is no laughing matter though. I can hear all the drunk Marines laughing; singing. And me I just sit here in my room doing nothing, wasting away. My new years resolution? I dont know time is blended for me, ever since my birth two years ago its never been the same. I am envious of them. Im weird in the way you dont want to be, because Im  never truly happy with my sickness. Yet I still put on that veil every moring so no one can tell. People worrying annoys the shit out of me. So I remain happy. I wonder what the creator was thinking when he created me, maybe he was late for dinner and forgot to put in that last component that makes us human. Sigh happy new years every one.

Before our eyes we see demice, yet ignore it.

Reality; so inconspicuous, mistaken with normality.

But what is real is rarely normal,

And what is normal never real. 

Our father’s and their father’s met demise fighting with reality.

” Ignorance is a bliss!” Is what they said.

So with eyes half open we’ve constructed the visions of our fathers,

A world where real is always normal; without realizing that stone is set to crumble.

And so quietly we mumbled, as we ate our T.V dinners we felt like the real winners.

Because thats real and normal, even as we watch it crumble.

Dance with me

 Its the law of the universe.

Heres some oldies, for all the old souls like me. Enjoy.

Their called by different names

but their eyes are all the same

And everywhere I go the faces come and follow.

Half way round the world they fill me up with sorrow.

My brain completly fried,  I ran, evaded, and cried.

Yet the faces stay the same, I can never hide my shame.

“How happy are you?

“Happy enough. To not close my peep hole”

“That doesnt help, give me a precentage”

“I’d say 60% happy, 40% Sad.”

“If you were in class you’d be about to fail”

 ”I know, just shut up; go away.”

” Dont tell me to shut up, your the one talking to yourself”

*sigh* ” I know…”

For  Reverend Green